Conditions
Paruresis
Have you ever been bursting for a wee, but found that you couldn’t go because other people were present? Well, don’t worry, you might be left dying for the toilet, but Paruresis (or ‘Bashful Bladder’ as it’s otherwise known) won’t kill you. This social anxiety disorder affects around 4 million men and women in the UK and can impact heavily on their daily lives. The most common manifestation of the condition is men who cannot urinate at a urinal and instead find themselves standing next to unzipped, exposed and free-flowing men, as if just a casual observer. Women can also find it difficult to urinate in a cubicle if there are people near by. The condition is caused by a neurological shutdown of the sphincter valves that when open allow urine to flow, but it is completely involuntary. However, several physical and cognitive therapy techniques have been devised to help people cope with this problem.
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I too suffer from this condition, its really hard to enjoy myself when at festivals, gigs or football matches. its really embarrassing when you spend so long standing at a urinal with people behind or next to you and nothing happens, but then its also annoyin wait around for a cubical and havin every thinking you need to poo about 6times a night
I have had this problem for years too. I'm a 43 year old male – father of three girls (thank goodness .. I didn't ever have to take them to the urinal) and have suffered from it since I was 14 I suppose. I was a late developer, so became self conscious when I was that age and aware others were maturing ahead of me. When going out as a teenager I had to have a few drinks first before I could face the gents. In looking for jobs I am always delighted when I find the office has a regular toilet rather than a urinal. To me it just does not seem right to pee when someone is within 1 foot of you. I have an understanding wife, and mentioned the problem to my brother last year who said he has also suffered from the problem on occasion.
i keep urinating in my boxers every 6-15 minutes only in little bits though like a spot size help
.i have skin problem,old part of my body get some white color skin,and i dont know what should i do to sort out this embarrassing things.i can not go to swiing pool or take off my shirt ,becuse i realy shy about that,i been in doctor an thay told me thay can not do any think about it to when i see your program
i have had this for a few years from the age of 11 to my current age of 14 but it is really embarrassing as when im in school i cant seen to well go. i really want to sort this out so that i dont have to wait untill everyone's gone.
i am 51 years old and cannot pee in any public toilet how embarrassing to go into one then have to come out after standing there with other people around unable to pee and thinking what the hell do these people think when they see you unable to pee then come out and think are they laughing at me
I have suffered this problem since the age of 16 . I AM NOW PUSHING 43 and still i suffer. My wife is understanding as we talk about it when ever their is a party or outing to go to. house partys are no problem its pubs and clubs weddings etc they are a real ball basher. Its devestating .
Have had this problem myself my entire life, really is a pain when it comes to social situations – the amount of times ive had to go around large public buildings to locate an empty toilet or one with cubicles with locks on is a joke. Going out socially is also a pain as I find myself going to bars I feel 'safe' in re the toilet facilities or otherwise holding it until we move onto a new location. I know it is psychological as once I have had a few drinks I can urinate freely in cubicles regardless of where I am.
This condition is well annoying and very debilitating!! I never realised I had it until one of my mates pointed out I always go in the cubicle and called me shy. Since he said that I've become more conscious about going the bathroom and deliberately avoid going at the same time with my mates just so they can't notice I'm using a stall. Some my mates shout for team pee's and team schoolboy pee's and I can never join them because I know I won't be able to go. Really frustrating the condition has got worse in the past year, remembering back to my school years… I did have it now I think of it, just never noticed that I did.
I also hate holding by pee in to wait for a safer time to go… I was recently at a festival and the lads were just peeing on the walls at the back of the tent… I found it so hard to go and could not go… unless hidden behind the tent and there's no one about… really annoying. After drinking pints and pints of beer I was feeling very very uncomfortable.
I've heard numerous solutions: cognitive therapy including NLP and hypnotism, solving maths puzzles in head, singing in head, gradual desensitisation therapy which involves gradual exposure, deep breaths and counting to four whilst closing eyes to ignore external stimuli…
Does any of this work? I find it really hard to implement any of these strategies successfully.
Please offer some advice, I am thinking about going to a GP to see what they can do and thinking about telling my best mate and my brother to see if that helps. I have no other anxiety/confidence issues but this really effects me.
Advice appreciated.
the way to help combating this is counting and multipliyng mentally it takes mind of the problem
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