Well done! I hope you start to feel better soon :) x

It would also be highly unprofessional for them to comment in a negative way about your self harm. If it's obvious then they should offer you advice on where to go for help. If you do want children it might be a good idea to seek help for your self harm, to think about developing better (positive) coping strategies. Conceiving, pregnancy, child birth and then coping with children can all be pretty stressful, it may push your current boundaries of self harm and you don't want it to escalate.

It takes time for scars to heal, sometimes they fade and sometimes they disappear IF the skin wasn't too damaged. My cat-scratch type scars healed with barely visible trace 98% of the time but anything with the slightest gape has healed with a scar. My worst scars have flattened and turned white but they show no sign of disappearing, 8 years down the line. Moisturise and massage them, it helps break down hard tissue and the moisturiser softens the skin. Makeup (foundation and powder) conceals flat scars well if it's applied sparingly and naturally but there isn't really a way to get rid of them completely. You should go to a doctor, self harm always has an attention-seeking stigma to it, but sometimes it's the only way somebody knows how to get the help they need. It can be an expression of how you feel, because it isn't always easy to explain how you feel. It's a vicious cycle, you cut because you feel utterly rubbish, you feel bad for cutting, you do it again to feel OK and it escalates. You can't cope with something, you cut. You're anxious, you cut. It's a negative downward cycle and you need someone who can understand this and try to help you out of it. You CAN feel better, but it might take time. Giving up might look like the easy option now but the repercussions it would have go so much beyond your own pain and it would affect your parents, friends and family. Talk to your parents, if they've been supportive they will help you get the treatment you need. Please be safe.

I'm seventeen, my doctor found out whilst I was in there for haveing my drink spiked and still feeling dizzy a few days later, so he had to put that thing around my arm, I was crappin my pants, (my dad was in the room with me), I made a lame excuse that I had 3 thick tops on and wont be able to pull it up all the way, my dad left the room, I asked if it had to be that arm, but he just looked at me weirdly and I sat down started crying and told him, I asked if he would tell my parents, he said 'No, you are 17, and mature, to be honest if you came in here when you were 15, if you were mature enough, I still wouldnt have told your parents. Anyway, I know you probably already went judging from the date you posted, but I still wanted to reply incase someone wanted to know thw answer. I was really worried when I researched and kept finding people writing that doctors have to tell your parents, maybe its just in certain countries or something, hope this helps someone.

I'm 13 and I made the desicion to tell my mum that I self harm and I won't help from the doctors I was worried about if the the doctor would tell my parent so I just told them if they love you they will won't the best for you and will come with you to the doctors but if you don't tell and your self harm is serious and need medical attention they will have to tell your parents so I think it would be better to tell them yourself x

Sorry; as a self harmer myself, I get the whole, I cut because of my low self esteem and whatnot; and at the beginning I started because my bff (still my bff) was cutting; but four and a half years on; she stopped and I keep finding reasons to carry on... its not worth it.. I just have a cut up arm, hardly any friends because I'm so scared someone will find out if I get too close, even if I try to make friends I dont have enough confidence in myself to do it. So seriously, dont follow the crowed like I did; not its become a real problem and I wouldnt be suprised if I suffer from depression too. Dont follow. The best you can do it tell your friend you are there for her.

Hi Baylee! I'm 20 years old and have been self harming for eight years. I started for more or less the same reasons. I didn't have a good home life, i was bullied at school, i had and still have body dis morphia. I cannot offer you a solution to your problem, but only let you know that you're not the only one who feels like this. Its good that you've spoken to a counselor, I didn't do that for years. Its good that you're admitting you know its not right and that you need help. I am also aware that most schools do not help with the situation. They have to tell your parents and it can exacerbate the situation. In my school, i saw a girl admit to a teacher that she self harmed and they called her mom in immediately. They all totally over reacted and didn't understand. Unfortunately, teachers are obliged to tell their superiors and then they decide what to do from there. BUT, if you think telling your teacher, and having your teacher talk to your parents for you or at least accompany you in a meeting would be easier, then i think that's a very good idea, you won't feel so alone and you're parents will remain a lot calmer. But, unfortunately the teacher simply will not be able to keep it to themselves. I also think at your age, your doctor would probably tell your parents if they felt your life was in danger. I used to cut 3 - 4 times a day...often at school with anything i could get hold of. I started on my arms, and then moved on to my sides, and my legs. My mother either didnt notice, or didnt want to see them. My parents would not have understood. I understand that you don't want people to treat you differently once you tell them. I was so worried people were going to start treading on eggshells around me and talking to me like i was crazy. Recently, whilst living in halls of residence at uni, i cut myself very deep and almost died. It was at this point that it shocked me into hardly doing it anymore. I still do it when im incredibly stressed, but it is few and far between. BUT i will say that i totally regret not telling my parents. I feel if i told them now, after so many years of lying and covering up it would create a lot of animosity. So the sooner you can tell them the better I'd say. I know that at some point, my mom or dad will see my scars and they will confront me about it. Every day I have to plan my outfits to help conceal them. When i go on holiday i can't wear a bathing costume, if its hot, i have to wear long sleeves...Im dreading the day they see them. I really don't want you to get into that sort of situation! If i could have told them, I think they might have helped me or made a conscious effort to improve my home life or help me out with my school work. I have realised as i have grown up and witnessed many families in the same situation that parents tend to go through a process when they find out their children are self harming. They go through anger, that you are destroying your body, shock, that you could do something so drastic, question WHY you couldn't tell them and guilt. But, they will calm down. They will listen. And they will understand eventually. If you can ride it out, then I think you'd be better off telling them. I also have no doubt that they'd be incredibly proud that you were brave enough to tell them. My dad is really hot headed so I he would probably call me stupid and an idiot, as he has no concept of depression or self harm. But, I know that really it would be out of shock than real anger. But, i understand the difficulties of doing so, and of course telling them won't necessarily stop you doing it. On a lighter note, Its brilliant that you lasted 2 weeks! I don't care about all the alternatives people give such as snapping elastic bands on your skin, drawing red lines on you and holding ice on you until it hurts, its not the same. So two weeks is fantastic. As a cutter, who has seriously decreased the amount i do it, I would advise not trying to go cold turkey and just stop all together. I would try and make the cuts smaller and thinner and do it less often if possible. Make sure you are using a steralised blade too, I got quite a few infections and they weren't safe or pleasant! I have done what i mentioned above (not try and struggle to just stop, but get smaller and thinner) and now I look back on some of my scars and wonder how on earth i could have done it that deep. I really hope you can cut down or even better stop before your life is ruled by your scars. I can assure you, that the sooner you stop, the better your self esteem will get. Not to mention that fact that you'd know that you got over self harming! I think you were very brave going to a councilor and also for writing on this message board. Perhaps, you could sit your parents down and not necessarily tell them about the self harming at first, but just about having low self esteem. They should be able to help with that for sure. Then see how you feel and telling them the rest. And finally, I think you should sit your friend down and explain to her that telling your parents, and not allowing you to tell them when you are ready will do more harm than good. A parent finding out from someone else may feel deceived, and even more guilty that you felt you could not go to them. From what you are saying, i doubt she is a self harmer. If she was she would understand its not as simple as just stopping. I found that i slowly just stopped thinking about it. You can't stop if you're still wanting to do it. You will stop when you are ready. Her heart is clearly in the right place and it is because she cares, ( i went through exactly the same thing with my best friend at 13) but i spoke to her as I've suggested and she begrudgingly agreed to not tell them. The fact you are asking for help is a good sign though. If you want my details to talk further I'll be happy to give them to you. Just let me know somehow. Good luck and I hope this massive essay has helped in some way. I understand that most webpages on self harm, though they are trying to be helpful often aren't, always encouraging you to go to your GP or your parents...If you could have done that, you wouldn't have started in the first place!? I know that my advice hasn't been that helpful, but I've been honest :) personally, I think you are perfectly capable of telling them and getting through the hard times. Good luck. I hope you feel better soon. :)